Let’s have a quick crash course in gaming lore: NFL Street good, NFL Tour bad… really bad! How on Earth a developer can get what is essentially exactly the same concept so right and then so horribly wrong really is beyond us, but alas, where there’s a will, there’s a way! NFL Tour looks horrendous, plays poorly, feels incredibly rushed and even fails to succeed in its main aim: capturing the rough and ready side of American football.

Clearly the reason NFL Tour exists is to provide a nice, easy experience compared to Madden, which we admit is rather complicated for noobs. However, Tour is so simple, there’s little-to-no fun to be had. Passing is as straightforward as selecting a receiver by pressing B and then tapping the Abutton, and breaking through tackles can be done by pushing the A-button, again, at the right time. Within minutes you’ll have figured out the correct rhythm and will more or less score on every play. Unfortunately, after your triumphant attack, you have to call on your defence, and good gosh, is that a waste of time! They range from completely useless to downright pathetic; even when you do manage to break through the competitor’s line, there’s no rhyme or reason to how they play. Either they’ll avoid every challenge thrown at them or be so ineffective it’s akin to playing against a group of Daves!

Just to ensure your time spent with NFL Tour is never worthwhile, the minigames that have been shoehorned in are beyond poor. Redzone Rush is boring (you take it in turns to try and score a touchdown against either one or two adversaries) and although Smash and Dash provides a few minutes of pleasure, the joy fades out unbelievably quickly.

And then, as always, comes the nail in the coffin. Whoever thought including an ironic commentator was parallel to a moment of genius needs to be slapped… in the mouth… with a fish! The idiot actually tells you that videogame sport announcers rely on a repetitive script and that he will do exactly the same thing! So, rather than secretly insult you, he admits it to your face and has a laugh at your expense. Yeah, that’s definitely not annoying...

It’s a massive shame that the Street licence has been replaced with a poor alternative, and we can only hope the powers that be revert to the original formula. This is arcade football at its absolute worst!

Simon Miller