Yes, Grendel’s mother does appear nude in this game tie-in to Robert Zemeckis’s Beowulf, but, unfortunately for those weirdos who get a kick out of polygon butts and boobs, the in-game model looks nothing like Angelina Jolie. Right, now the smut has been dealt with, onto the game itself. It’s not bad at all, feeling a little like the recent Conan game but with an actual budget, more polish and proper Hollywood talent. Ray Winstone, Brendan Gleeson, Anthony Hopkins and more – all in one game, being beardy, angry and chopping things up while screaming “fear me!”; it’s all very manly.

It’s also very pretty. Where the film employs performance capture to form digitally recreated versions of the cast, Beowulf: The Game strikes a balancing act between realism and overanimation. The sound deserves special mention too: not just for the excellent voice acting, but also the music itself. It features one of the most bizarre uses of rhythm action we’ve seen. Every now and then, you’ll have to call on your squad of Thanes to clear doorways, operate levers, row ships or even sing. To give the men a boost of courage you have to hit the X-button or hold Y as they appear on screen, timing it perfectly to string them together.

It’s nuts, and one of the best ideas the game has. Another is the fact this hasn’t at all been toned down like the film. Co-screenwriter and comic legend Neil Gaiman admitted before the film was released that it was originally far more adult – a violent tale that had lots of nudity and swearing. While the film was cut down, the game retains its more adult edge. Sure, the violence isn’t as bad as Conan, in which you can literally rip enemies apart, but the claret is almost always spraying in Beowulf.

However, just like Conan, what we’re dealing with is a game that is complacent and just another hack-‘n’- slash adventure. With added Winstone, of course. It’s a lot of fun, but thinner on ideas than Ms Jolie is in body mass.

Craig Gilmore